I’ve discussed ways to overcome addiction to the World of Warcraft, but in that article I only briefly touched on the reasons why people become addicted. I will look into that further here.
Different people get addicted for different reasons, but there are some common causes that exist in the appeal of the game.
Because first-hand knowledge and experience are most valuable, I will begin by relating my own experience.
I originally wrote a similar article detailing my 15-year life with a meth user. I have yet to post it. While I still plan to post that at some point, I found it too difficult to publish at this point. If you’ve lived with a meth user, you know how emotionally, physically, and mentally draining it can be. So for the time being, I will compromise with myself and post a more objective description of meth use.I’ve read other sites, and sometimes I get the idea these “experts” have never lived with a meth user through the worst of it. I don’t write this with the expertise of a doctor who has studied patients and run tests.
I lived with a user. For well over a decade. I was married into a family of them. I saw her family and friends all doing it. Through my ordeal I learned to hate the drug, but I also became quite familiar with the signs and the cycle that follows meth use. I may not be an expert at treating it, but I am definitely an expert at spotting it.
If you feel like someone you love may be using meth, I will describe what you might be seeing.
One common denominator of meth use is secrecy. If you’re not a fellow user or supplier, you won’t be privy to the truth of their world. They’ll lie to your face and assume you believe everything they say. Users hide their addictions, deny it, and sometimes even ridicule others for doing it (perhaps to throw us off the scent?).
Just before using, you might sense something is going on. You’ll see unusual behavior, such as disappearing into another room to take a call, going into the bathroom for 20 minutes, running a sudden “errand” that would normally wait (such as running out for milk at 1am when you still have half a gallon in the fridge). You might also see certain “friends” show up for very brief visits, sometimes not even getting out of their car.
If you haven’t been able to translate the above issues - wow you’re slow! No, just kidding. Haha.. They simply mean the meth user is looking for some drugs.
The Deal
A meth user will often go on the hunt for their drug. They’ll disappear to make phone calls, or even drive to their dealer’s house if the can’t contact him. Those are the “errands” they usually run. Or sometimes their dealer might even show up, either having been called or maybe just making a courtesy call to see if the user needs anything.
How thoughtful.
Using
After the deal, the meth user will then go do the deed. It could be in the bathroom or in their car in a nearby field. They might also do it somewhere that is more “meth friendly” than around you, such as at another user’s house. The actual use is very brief - only a few moments.
You might see remnants of the use, such as straws, pieces of tin foil, small bags or pieces of plastic wrap, razor blades, lighters - you get the idea. These things are all standard meth-related items. If the user snorted it, he could be touching his nose often because of the sensation/irritation of sucking it up his nose.
Hey we’re just getting started. This is where you enter the picture and start to see things.
The High
After doing meth, the user will display some very obvious and animated signs. The pupils will be dilated. To me that was always the tip-off. Dilated eyes, even in a bright room, were always immediate and obvious. The skin is warm to the touch and heart is pounding. You will see a mood that is a little bit too happy. And lots of energy. Meth users often get little or no sleep for days after using. They will also display exaggerated or semi-uncontrolled mannerisms, such as constant cleaning, preening, talking, etc., along with uncontrolled twitching or facial tics. During the high, the meth user often lacks an appetite and may go an entire day eating virtually nothing. It’s not uncommon to see them overly productive, such as cleaning or doing repetitive tasks, even in the middle of the night. They might pick at their hair or skin repeatedly. Almost obsessively. When they do sleep, it might be agitated and filled with movement, sweating, talking, laughing, or gibberish. The user may exhibit a heightened sexual arousal. You may even notice that the person has an unusual odor.
So why do meth users want to be this way? They don’t. Those are only the things being externalized. Inside, they are experiencing a sense of euphoria, confidence, and well-being that is far beyond what they feel when sober. They live for the high, and deal with everything else.
Those of us on the outside can’t imagine how it becomes worth it. But it does.
The Plateau
There is a brief period between the high and the crash in which the user begins to shift behavior patters. I call this the Plateau. The high is coming to and end and the user begins to display new symptoms. He begins to slow down. He might still be animated, but in a less energetic state. If he can’t get more meth, he will start to head quickly into the crash.
The Crash (aka “Coming Down”)
When a meth user has exhausted his supply and what he ingested has worked its way through his system, we have the crash. A crashing user might spend several days in bed. He might be asleep the entire time, or is awake but lethargic. He might only getting up to use the restroom or have a quick snack. The worst part of the crash is that it’s typically accompanied by a very agitated and foul demeanor. The user can get violent and display psychotic traits and huge mood swings. Lethargic, irrational, angry, moody, and confused - these are all signs of the crash.
From my perspective, this was by far the worst part. Whereas the user is mostly irritating during the high, he is more likely to focus his crashing ire directly at you. You will likely get sucked into absurd arguments or even find yourself dodging violent behavior.
It can last a few days. A few days of hell.
The Recovery
As the crash wears off, the meth user begins to revert back to his pre-high self. He might even exhibit better than normal behavior.
And just when you think life is back to normal, the cycle soon repeats and the roller coaster ride begins again. It is exhausting and frustrating for the loved ones enduring it.
Though I’ve focused on the short-term signs of meth use, I should point out that there are long-term signs of meth use as well. Weight loss, tooth decay, poor hygiene, increased acne, dry skin, hair loss, mental illness, memory loss, paranoia, depression, and psychosis are all possible. Not all of these are necessarily reversible.
If you suspect someone you love is using meth, you need to get help. If you can’t get help, you need to get out.
Though I am no expert, if you would like to contact me directly about this, feel free to comment or email me at waffles@wafflesatnoon.com.
For other articles on addiction, see Overcoming Myspace Addiction and Overcoming Addiction to the World of Warcraft.
Two years ago if someone had told me I’d ever write about this topic, I would have laughed in their face. I can almost understand the addictive nature of certain video games, such as I discussed in my article about overcoming addiction to the World of Warcraft. Certainly I understand the physiological nature of other addictions such as drugs, alcohol or even sex.
But Myspace?
There are obviously many reasons why people like Myspace, but just as many reasons why people don’t like it. It can be a place to keep your friends and family connected, or it can be a breeding ground for juvenile drama. And pretty much everything in between. What’s most odd about Myspace addiction is that it seems to manifest itself in many wildly different forms. I’ll take a look at a few prominent types.
Romance trolling addiction
Looking to meet that certain someone? Why pay $30 a month to some corporate dating site when you can go Myspace and meet people for free? A lot of people have turned to Myspace instead traditional dating websites. It’s free, and the largest social network out there (And yes I know - Facebook is closing the gap fast). If there’s a date to be found online, there’s no better place to look. The problem is, Myspace is beyond huge and not everyone on there is looking for a date. So it’s a lot of work. I’ve known guys to spend hours upon hours sifting through the hundreds of women that show up in the search results. They’ll go to each woman’s page, look at her pictures, read her profile, and contact the ones he feels are good prospects. Remember that not all of them are even interested in being contacted. So unlike a dating site, where at least the people on there have shown an interest in meeting people, you just never know with Myspace. And often a person is just being nice by responding to their correspondence, and not really interested. But that takes a while to figure out for a lot of people.
It can be a full time job.
So back to our guy trolling for women… Once a few ladies accept his friend requests, he’ll spend even more time attempting to forge some sort of friendship with them while still searching for more ladies to contact.
What’s the problem? First, there’s no guarantee that the woman you see in the pictures is the person you’re actually emailing or talking to. It’s not uncommon for a less attractive woman to “borrow” pictures from a random pretty girl’s page to increase her friend requests. It happens far more than you might think. Second, women are inundated by male friend requests and often give little attention to these guys. There are also concerns about the “creepiness” of meeting someone online. If a girl tells her friends she’s going on a date with a guy she met online, she’ll be pelted with warnings and stories of how every guy meeting women online is a rapist, murderer, or loser.
And the sad news is… if you’ve spent that much time on Myspace, you just might be a loser.
But you’re not alone. At least not online.
Profile Pimping Addiction
Some hardcore Myspace addicts spend countless hours “pimping” their page, which means constantly updating the look and layout of their page. They’ll search for hours for that “perfect” template to apply to their page, then more hours looking for that perfect song. Next, they’ll post a bulletin telling all their friends to see their new layout. Then they’ll focus on posting dozens of pictures, or filling out inane surveys. By the time they’ve done all that, it’s time to find a new look and start the cycle all over again.
The dating scenario above is typical of slightly older guys. This particular scenario leans towards the younger Myspace crowd. A teen’s Myspace page is an extension of their real life social status. They’re concerned with what everyone thinks of their clothes, hair, and of course Myspace page. Nothing gets a profile pimp off more than having someone take notice of their new look.
And a profile pimp will pretty much have a new look every week. Or even more often than that. At some point the desire to keep updating the look of the page becomes a sort of obsession.
Friend Pimps
Whereas a profile pimp is concerned with the appearance of the page, a friend pimp focus more on the sheer volume of friends he has online. Of course a Myspace “friend” isn’t necessarily a friend. Or someone you even know. I used to get friend requests, accept them, never heard from that person at all, and after a few months I’d delete them. I’ve seen individuals - who weren’t even famous - having thousand of Myspace friends.
Seems like they’re compensating for something.
Anyone can have thousands of Myspace friends. It’s hard to say why a Myspace Friend Pimp feels so compelled to add untold people to their friends list. It becomes obsessive because with millions of people online, there is practically no limit to the number of friends one can have. There will always be more prospective friends out there, so the friend pimping becomes a fulltime job.
Overcoming Myspace addiction
This requires the addict to address why they have become hooked in the first place. Social networks are nice because they allow otherwise shy people to reach out and make friends that they otherwise wouldn’t. For some, however, this becomes a crutch. They rely on Myspace or similar social sites to shield them from the issues that brought them there.
How ironic.
Social websites can actually lead some people to becoming less socially adept in the real world. The more “popular” they get online - whether from their profile pimping, volume of friends, or new prospective dates they meet online - the more involved they get with their page, and the less they get out in the real world and interact with others face to face.
It’s not unlike the shy guy who has a few drinks and suddenly has the courage to approach women. Liquid courage. So with Myspace, it’s a sort of Virtual Courage. The lack of direct communication with others allows for a sort of virtual social courage that the user otherwise lacks.
It’s not just how much time an addict spends on Myspace, but how much of their social life it becomes. Do they check Myspace first thing when they wake up in the morning and at night before bed? Do they talk about it when not at the computer? Does it seem that Myspace is the center of this person’s social life, rather than an extension of it?
It’s fine to occasionally change the look of your page, or look for friends or even dates online. It’s when this becomes an overwhelming force in your life that you need to step back and look in the mirror instead of the monitor.
The best way to wean yourself from Myspace is to take steps to deemphasize it. Limit your time on it, only check it once a day, reduce your profile to a bare and basic minimum, unsubscribe to blogs and email notifications.
You should bite the bullet also tell your friends what you’re trying to do. Instead of communicating via Myspace, get their phone numbers or other IM screen name and contact them that way. And don’t set your homepage to Myspace. Bad idea. Set it to something else interesting.
Also you should think about the time you spend on Myspace. Has that brought you any value to your life? Will any of it matter in the long run? What else could you be doing to improve your life and your relationships other than sitting on Myspace, posting bulletins and browsing other people’s pages?
It really can be a huge waste of time.
If you really feel that you want to stop but can’t, there is one sure fire way…
Delete your account and never look back. Don’t hesitate - just do it. Then call a friend and go do something.
If you’ve played one of the various online games such as World of Warcraft of Everquest, you have probably dealt with video game addicts first-hand. Maybe even you are addicted. This article will address video game addiction and some things to consider when trying to break free of it.
I have played, and been addicted to, both Everquest and World of Warcraft (referred to as EQ and WoW, respectively). In the latter case, the addiction lasted longer, and relapsed. In some respects, it’s a salute to the game maker, who has made a game so good that players find themselves practically unable to stop playing.
One immediate problem is that in gamer circles, a game’s addictiveness is considered a positive trait. Read some of the well known gamer forums and you’ll see rave reviews about how addictive games are to the reviewer. They actually use the term in a positive manner.
Hardcore gamers want a game they can’t put down.
In the case of World of Warcraft, there is no real end to the game. Even when your character hits level 70 (the current cap, which will be raised in the next expansion), there are always more things you can do to improve your character. There are trade skills, better armor, better weapons, reputations to increase, and gold to be made. Not to mention helping your other characters (called “alts”) level up as well.
You can’t finish the game because there is no end.
That’s why Everquest was so well named when it arrived in 1999… There is no final battle. There is no ultimate ending. It just goes on and on…
This is how gamers are so drawn in. Not only is there an immeasurable amount of things to do in the game, but also because there are millions of other players online, making it a social environment. Some people have virtually no social lives outside of these games. I know I certainly made a couple friends online, and there were people far more engrossed than I.
So not only does game play itself keep gamers coming back, but their social investments bring them back as well. There are guilds, which are groups of people who have meetings, plan in-game events, etc. Some members of these guilds literally plan their lives around guild events within the game.
Real life simply becomes a series of bridges between World of Warcraft sessions.
There have been horror stories of extreme addiction, such as the Korean parents who were both Warcraft addicts and whose daughter died due to neglect that stemmed directly from their addiction. Or the young man who died from playing for nearly 50 hours straight. In-game players have often bragged about how WoW ended marriages and relationships. Some players have also stated a preference to the World of Warcraft than the real world. I’ve seen “real life sucks” stated in the game by other players. More than once.
Again, having been an avid player myself, I recognize just how easy it is to get sucked in.
Getting hooked into games such as Warcraft is easy, because it’s very fun early on. The graphics and music are stunning. Building a character up through the early levels is quite easy. It takes only a couple minutes to get from level 1 to level 2. Progress slows considerably later on, and then when you hit level 70, it’s not a matter of leveling up any longer, but of making your level 70 more powerful. Progress gets slower and frustration begins to set in. Instead of looking forward to playing a fun game, it becomes a habit, almost to the point of dreading it. “Oh man I have to win 5 more battlegrounds today,” or “I dread having to go farm materials for tailoring today,”… yet they do it. The game becomes one long, never-ending checklist of things to do.
Things that have absolutely no meaning in the real world.
Sometimes a player will manage to step back enough to take a look at his behavior and realize how far they have gone. A few simple questions helped me see my problem more clearly.
Chances are if you’re reading this article, you’re wondering if you or someone you love is hooked. And if you got this far, you probably already know the answer.
Unlike drug addiction, or even gambling addiction, it does seem that many video game addicts eventually become burnt out and give it up. Not always. And it could take months or years, and oftentimes they simply switch to a new game and continue their addictive behavior. There are dozens of other online games similar to WoW.
From my experience, and from that of my friends who have also played Warcraft, the two best ways to stop are from burnout – and simply realizing that you are wasting valuable time in your life… and also cold turkey. Cold turkey is psychologically tough because you will have the urge to play for a few days. Once you realize how much more you are getting done during your newfound free time, and how many things there are for you to experience in the real world, you start to realize how worthless it is to immerse yourself so intensely into a video game.
Another idea is to give someone you trust your user name and password and have them log into your account. Then have them change the password and the email associated with the account so you can no longer log in. Have them cancel your account and swear not to give you the password in order to re-subscribe. I don’t suggest using the parental control area to limit playing. The only way to break the addiction is to be completely away from the game.
Fortunately, breaking the spell of Warcraft is “only” psychological. You don’t have to physically detox, so going cold turkey will not kill you. It might make you irritable. Like problem gambling, video game addiction is a problem with impulse control. The causes of this impulse control is something you’ll have to address at some point.
After a few days without Warcraft, the real world comes into much sharper focus. You’ll feel an intense sense of relief, and you’ll find many more things to fill your time. Relationships will improve, chores will get done, and you’ll get more sleep. You can start working on a checklist of things to do to improve your real life, instead of the character you played in WoW.
You have to make the decision to do it. Don’t cheat and “hop on for a few minutes.” If you feel you are addicted, you must act immediately and fully. You owe it to yourself and your loved ones. If you feel that breaking the addiction is beyond your control, you may have to seek professional help. And you should never be embarrassed to do so. Do what you can break free of the addiction before the addiction breaks you.
Video game addiction is something you can and will overcome. It will also give you more appreciation of the World of Real Life, which is full of beauty and excitement that no video game can replace.
For further reading, see my post about the reasons people become addicted to the World of Warcraft.